Expect Positive, Accept Negative

 

Expect Positive,

Accept Negative

One of the things people often say is to live without expectations. I am not sure whether it is even possible to live without expectations. But I guess, we can choose whether to live with positive expectations, negative expectations, or realistic expectations.

Though realistic expectations, sounds to be an ideal middle way, it is not always possible, because of a number of factors such as data bias and the play of emotions, that is involved.

For instance, during this COVID pandemic, we could predominantly find two segments of people. One was the “Hope givers” and the other was “Fear givers”.

Hope is a positive expectation; Fear is a negative expectation. Both are needed for survival. So, the role of both were equally important in a way. While they were extremely negative and predicting the situation to be the doomsday of the world and people went into serious depression as they sunk into the fear, the words of hope givers was a solace and gave the courage that we can overcome the situation. At the other extreme, we could see people totally careless and too casual, not understanding the seriousness of the situation. In this case, the words of the fear givers, served as a warning for people to take adequate precautions, to stay safe.

At any point of time, we will experience both. But we can choose to align ourselves to what makes us feel mentally strong and emotionally good.

I wanted to align myself to the hope givers, not because I was not aware of the seriousness of the situation, but because I felt it was more conducive for my emotional and mental well-being. There is this psychological concept which says, “Our words become thoughts, our thoughts become our feelings, and our feelings becomes our action.” So, when we consciously choose to talk about positive things, what we want to see, rather than talking about what we don't want to see, we can expect to have positive results too.

So, now the question is just because I choose to be positive, are only positive things going to happen? Doesn’t it sound like blind faith, which defies all logic?

True, it doesn’t sound logical. But what better option do we have?  Let’s see how we have evolved through the pandemic so far.

It is almost 3 years, since we first heard the word COVID and ever since, it seems to have become stuck up with our everyday vocabulary. Initially, we thought it will last only a few days or months, but the reality was different. It prolonged and brought in a number of unexpected changes such as virtual meeting, no handshake, wearing a mask at all times, lock down, social distancing which was initially uncomfortable, but over time, we started to adapt in order to survive. Change is never comfortable, but reality of life is filled with a lot of changes.

Fear and panic filled the first few days. But later it was something we felt within control. With the vaccination rolled out, hope was around the corner that things will be alright again. When people spoke about the second wave, I said it wouldn’t happen. But the second wave struck with more fury. The media was full of tragic and frightening news. Yet our mind had learnt to handle fear because it was not something new. Now the second wave is almost over, some people are still talking about a possible third wave, and I choose not to comment, but still keep my faith that we will survive the crisis. I realize that it may take longer, than we would want for the pandemic to end, yet hope has been the only light, which has helped us sail through the rough tide.

Let’s remember, COVID is not our enemy. It has no intention to kill us. Like all other life form’s its only intention is to survive, like all of us, human beings. We just need a way to find a way to protect ourselves, in this play of nature. In the nature’s game, we are just a number. Humility with courage and patience is the only way we can survive this chaos.

So, we can choose to expect the positive, but if something negative happens, we should have the mental and emotional capability to accept the negative. With an enhanced belief in science and faith in God, let’s move forward.

   D. Senthil Kannan,

   CEO, PALMS Training & Consulting (P) Ltd., Tuticorin.

  Author of "Transformational Thoughts" - A Journey of learning 

  Email: senthilkannand@gmail.com