Are We Happy in a Hostile World?

During one of my trips to Kodaikanal for a JCI training event, I went out for a morning walk around the lake, with a group of friends. As we were walking, I saw a newly married couple, who were clicking photos of each other. The lady was posing for some snaps while the man was clicking and vice versa. I felt that they would like to have a photo together. (These were the days, when people did not find selfies). So, I went and asked them, “Would you like to have a photo of you both together?” They both readily blushed and gave me the camera, and posed for an intimate photo. They felt very glad and thanked me. I too felt happy that I had made someone smile. These little acts of kindness, not only brings joy to the receiver, but to the giver too.

As I continued to walk, I started contemplating within myself, “Why was it difficult for them to ask for help?” Perhaps, any passer-by would have willingly done this small favour, if they had just asked, “Can you please take a photo of us”. Why was that they waited for someone to volunteer? This is when I realized that we have started to become more and more hostile, towards the people around us. Is it because of fear or is it because of ego? The reasons can be many, but looking at closely I feel, by and large we have stopped trusting people. We have become so suspicious of the people around us, that even if someone smiles at us, we are thinking what could be the person’s motive. Well, I recognize the amount of theft and crime happening in the society, by trusting the wrong people. The amount of negative headlines and pathetic stories of people being cheated, which we read almost daily in the newspaper has put people in a state of frenzy and a mode of alert.

When you are in a railway station, you could have heard announcements or seen notice boards with the message, “Don’t take food from strangers”. So, when we travel on a train, if even someone offers us some of their homemade snacks, out of love, we tend to reject it. Well, we have seen in newspapers, incidents of people being robbed or kidnapped, by strangers offering sweets or snacks with sedative substance.

While travelling on the roads, especially through the villages it has been a practice, that when we were not sure of the route, we stop, pull down our shutter and ask someone standing there, as to how to go to a particular place. The person happily tells us the route and feels a sense of fulfilment that he has guided someone. But today, we depend on the GPS in our smart phone, to find the route rather than asking people.

With long stretches of highways in place and with traffic speeding at 120+, even if we witness a roadside accident, we continue our journey, without caring to help, because we are afraid of the police formalities and other consequences. However, our timely help could have saved a life.

I certainly feel that, in the name of being safe, we have become selfish. We are losing out on the human touch. We have lost connect with the people around us. We do not know who lives in our next door. All our relationships have become superficial in nature as we find it difficult to trust anyone. In our endeavour not to be cheated by wrong people, we end up losing the opportunities of getting connected to a great number of good people.

While there are many reasons for us to be cautious about our personal safety, it also does not feel meaningful to live such a hostile life, where we do not able to trust our fellow human beings. Amidst so much of hostility, let us care to smile and converse with strangers with good intentions, and at the same time exercise prudent caution, so that no one takes us for a ride.

   D. Senthil Kannan,

    Managing Trustee, PALMS, Tuticorin.

    Author of "Transformational Thoughts" - A Journey of learning 

    Email: senthilkannand@gmail.com