The Integrity Gap

"Be the change

you wish to see"

 

Mahatma Gandhi

In one of the training sessions, we were discussing about values. Many people talked about integrity, as being one of their core values. So, I was trying to relate myself to the value, to see how far I sync with that value. This made me to ponder over this word deeper, to gain a better understanding. I realized integrity is when our thoughts, words and actions are in alignment. In other words, when we mean what we say and act according to it, then we have integrity.

 

We have often heard this quote, "Practice what you preach and preach what you practice". I dissected this quote further, to see if both the sentences of the quote mean the same. I realized that though it sounds rhyming and similar, they are different, when it comes to our practical life. Let's consider each of them separately and see how it is different.

 

The first line is "Practice what you preach".  Though, it is easy to say this, it is difficult for most of us, as we don’t tend to practice what we preach.

Many times, we are good at giving advice to others or telling how people should ideally live, but when we do an honest introspection of ourselves, we don’t follow the same. For example, Doctors advise us to take healthy foods and avoid unhealthy habits, but not all of them follow it. Similarly, lawyer who are meant to protect the law are the ones who find the loopholes to escape the law. Also, life skill coaches or trainers, who teach how one should behave, don’t exhibit the ideal behaviour. So, this integrity gap exists with almost all the professions.  We don’t always practice what we preach.  This may make us seem like a hypocrite, to others.  This could also put a pressure in us, to protect our image, by being socially conscious.  This leads to being afraid, that someone might catch us wrong or mock at our integrity gap. Both can be stressful.

 The second line is "Preach what you practice". This is a little easier as compared to the previous because you are just telling what you are already doing. However, this may sound like self-boasting which is not often taken well by others. Moreover, not everyone thinks and feels the same. People have different ways of doing things or dealing with an issue. The world is full of choices and so people can decide to live the life their wish. So, when we tend to get preachy, people may get averse to us and avoid us.

 

So, here is the third alternative which I think is a better option. "Just practice, but don't preach". When you decide to follow this approach, you just live your life, the way you think and feel is right. There may be few things that you do, which could impress people and make them want to emulate your behaviour.

 

For example, if you are always punctual, people might get impressed by your punctuality and try to emulate the same.  Similarly, if you always follow the traffic rules, such as wearing a seat belt/ helmet, not over speeding, stopping at signals etc., irrespective of whether the policeman is watching or not, then people might find this as a good practice, get inspired and follow the same.  So, there is absolutely no pressure on you. At the same time, you are creating a positive change just by the way you are.

 

Like the saying goes, "Action speaks louder than words", let your actions speak loud and clear. This will surely reduce the internal conflicts within you and help pave the way to bridge the integrity gap.

 D. Senthil Kannan,

 CEO, PALMS Training & Consulting (P) Ltd., Tuticorin.

 Author of "Transformational Thoughts" - A Journey of learning 

 Email: senthilkannand@gmail.com

      The Kings Mindset

In one of the training programmes, I attended the trainer said , ‘Have you noticed that the word KING is embedded in the word, “ThinKING”, which shows that we have to think like a King.

I found this observation interesting and pondered more on these lines. When I thought of the word “King”, the first thought that came to my mind was the Lion, which is called as the King of the Jungle. We all know that in the Jungle, the Elephants are bigger, the Tigers are stronger, the Cheetahs are faster, the Giraffes are taller, and the Foxes are wiser, but why is it that Lion is called the king of the jungle? It is because of its attitude or rather it’s way of thinking. So, it reaffirms the idea, that the way one thinks, determines whether a person has the quality of a king or not.

 

As a student or reader of history, we have often been fascinated by the life of great kings. There have been ruthless kings and benevolent kings, clever kings, and foolish kings, yet a King has been someone who is looked up high and is not answerable to anyone. It is a lineage they have inherited by virtue of their birth or by their accomplishments. However, it is difficult to describe an ideal king because they differ from person to person. Some are charismatic, some are brave, some are generous and so on. So, an ideal king, is probably one, who embodies the different good qualities we have found in many rulers. Here are a few pointers, I feel should serve as a King’s way of thinking.

 

Think Fearlessly – One of the reasons why the Lion is called a King of the Jungle is because it is truly fearless. The king has to exhibit his courage, not only in his words but also in his action. He should lead from the front. There is a saying, “An army of sheep led by a lion will defeat an army of lions led by a sheep” because a good leader can transform cowards into warrior and vice versa.

Think Abundance – “Live Life King Size” is the slogan of a famous cigarette brand. A king should be someone who can think BIG. A king should be generous and have an abundant mindset.  A king is not just someone who amasses great wealth, but someone who gives it away generously. It is difficult to imagine, a miser to be a King. We have heard stories of kings, giving expensive gifts, to poets and scholars and throwing luxurious treats to guests. So, having an abundant mindset and being magnanimous, is a quality we look for in a king.

Think Collectively – A king makes decision, not just for him, but on behalf of the entire kingdom he represents. He is the voice of the many people who have put their faith on him as a ruler. Should a king be an autocrat or democrat,  is a question we come across often. Well, it not possible to take democratic decisions every time. However , he can be a benevolent autocrat, who takes into consideration the needs and wants of his people, and takes the best possible decisions which is in their best interest. His decision should be for the larger good, and not to satisfy his ego.

 

Think Individually – Though this may sound contradictory to the previous one, it means that though the king consults with all his ministers, the decision is always taken by him. So, a king should seek wise counsel but always take his own decision based on the information he has gathered and after understanding the short-term and long- term implication of his decision.  And once he takes a decision, he has to be firm in implementing it.

 

Think Protectively – The King is expected to protect his territory and his people. While marching with a sense of confidence, the king has to tread with caution as well. He has to assess the strength and weakness of his opponents and plan a right strategy, to combat his enemy. His ultimate goal should be to protect his people, and should live up to the expectation of his people.

 

Think Indiscriminately – We have heard many stories of kings who have been indiscriminate in administering justice irrespective of whether the defaulter of the rule, was their kith or kin. To a king everyone is same, under the eyes of law. A King cannot have favorites and show discrimination if he has to be a fair ruler. Thinking fairly or indiscriminately, is therefore a virtue of a good King.

 

Let’s embrace these thinking patterns of a king, and live like a  King.

 D. Senthil Kannan,

 CEO, PALMS Training & Consulting (P) Ltd., Tuticorin.

 Author of "Transformational Thoughts" - A Journey of learning 

 Email: senthilkannand@gmail.com